Dear Music:

I’ve gotten to know you more lately. I feel like we’ve gotten closer in the last weeks than we’ve ever been. It all started with that night after Break The Silence, when we were all hanging out at Ishmael’s: Matt spinning, various people taking turns on the drums, June and Linda singing, John playing the fucking accordion (that beast can play anything!), Seth and Tim and Ryan turning Disney ballads into rap songs, it was all glorious. I sat behind the drum kit and could barely hold a steady beat for longer than a minute or two and my timing is terribly off, but man, it was amazing.

There’s something about you that gets under the skin in a completely different way than words do, and drumming in particular appeals to me on some primal level. I had given up on learning to play an instrument back when I failed (to keep trying) to learn to play guitar, but now I have the desire to practice with more sincerity than I ever tried before.

I owe you an apology– actually, I feel like all of us, the whole world of people with iPods and car stereos owe you an apology. We owe you an apology for taking you for granted too often, for just having you in the background but not really listening. Of course, there are times when background music is good and important during social events and interaction between people is the most important thing, but I realized that I had stopped appreciating you fully when I started having such easy access to you all the time. I would turn you on in my MP3 player, stick those earbuds in my ears, and then hardly pay attention to you as I go about doing whatever I’m doing.

I’m learning to be more okay with ambient noise, with the sounds of the life around me when I ride my bike or drive or write, and to really pay attention to you when you’re around.

Peace & love,
N