how, once

we began with
a look
held
just long enough
to pose a question

will you approach?

and turned to
it’s-very-nice-to-meet-you
kisses

we found places to hide
together that were not
so hidden

two walls
and each other’s bodies
were enough then

each of us
with our own
private hunger

fueled by youth
and recklessness

we didn’t care who saw

and then
there was the rest

where there was
less kindness
and walls between us

and we turned our backs
to protect ourselves
from each other

and the space we made dissolved
in tears and cigarette smoke
and empty hangers in the closet

and i was different
after that