vise

there are things i hold close things that are most certainly not very good for me emotional crutches chemical influences patterns of fantasy they have a hold on me and i embrace them back call it a foolish consistency call it addiction call it by any term you please someday it may not be this … Continue reading vise

utility

i need to use my hands they are small, but they are hungry their fingertips, though calloused, want to offer gentleness these palms criss-crossed by the lines of a haphazard life also know what it is to cradle with care these hands are hungry to grasp, to hold, to stroke they yearn for rock, strings, … Continue reading utility

not dreaming

i am enveloped in a warm reality which has me caught in much absent waking reverie this must be what it is like to be completely awake.

of selves

how many other young, brown-skinned short-statured girls dreamt as i dreamt of waking into a next, an other life with more money, less melanin and european heritage? standing in a shower with muted pink walls trying to imagine what it would be like to have a life like the non-Asian people on TV wondering whether … Continue reading of selves